Friday, October 19, 2012

Culture Shock and the Like

Traveling in Vietnam is a lot of fun.  Every day is filled with novel, exotic experiences, delicious food, beautiful sights, amazingly helpful and friendly people.  I feel super relaxed, and am so grateful to have this long break from work and school after such an arduous struggle completing PhD.  For the first time in as long as I can remember my back and shoulders don't hurt.  I have long, beautiful, fingernails (I tend to bite them when I am stressed).  We keep meeting very cool fellow travelers, from all over the world, who we have really interesting conversations (and a lot of fun) with.

But traveling is also challenging, and this wouldn't be a very accurate blog if I didn't also talk about the struggles of traveling in a developing country with a very different culture.  I believe that this makes me appreciate home even more, because there is so much I take for granted there that just doesn't happen here in Vietnam.  A lot of the below differences are true in many developing countries, and many places in Asia, but because I've only been to Vietnam, I am keeping the below discussion to what I've noticed here.

Prices

Prices don't mean anything here.  Everything is negotiable -- even in a grocery store, hospital, or pharmacy.  On the one hand this is kinda fun.  Bartering is a new skill I am developing (and getting quite good at).  On the other hand, I constantly have the feeling that I am getting inflated prices for being white.  This sets up a weird dynamic of distrust and resentment between the tourists and the locals.  I never believe that a price I am given is fair (from taxi rides, to hotel rates, to peanut butter in a grocery store).  Because there are rarely price tags anywhere, and the rate of inflation in Vietnam is approximately 25% a year, it is hard to get a gauge online or elsewhere of what price to expect.  We have the most up-to-date Lonely Planet and the prices there seem to be 25-50% off (either that or we are being constantly over charged).  

Of course everything here is relatively cheap, and so I feel guilty haggling over $0.50 or $1.00.  Yet, it is frustrating to be quoted prices that are 100-300% higher than I would if I were Vietnamese.  I suspect the Vietnamese I interact with are equally frustrated that I don't ever believe the prices they quote me, and am constantly trying to pay less -- especially when I so obviously have money to spend (my camera alone costs around twice what a Vietnamese farmer makes in a year).  I negotiated a ride to the airport with a taxi driver for 300,000 Dong ($15).  The meter was at 350,000 when he dropped me off.  I am not sure who pays that difference, but he was obviously annoyed that he could have gotten more if we had used the meter.  He did drop me off not at the departure drop-off, but literally at the front of the airport, where I had to walk 5 minutes (bags in tow) to get the terminal.  There have also been many situations where I have negotiated a fare ahead of time with a driver and the meter is much less than what I paid.... 

Sales People

Many of the sales people here are aggressive by western standards.  When I go into a market people often physically grab me and start wrapping scarves around my neck or putting jewelry on my wrists.  People will tell you that they haven't made any sales today and that they really need the money to feed their family.  People will look longingly into your eyes and say "Please buy from me, please madam."  Women will flatter and compliment you excessively to convince you to buy something.

In Sapa, many women (and children) from the minority tribes (known for their weaving and embroidering) wandered around the city looking for tourists to sell to.  They are dressed beautifully in their traditional garb, and are an incredibly exotic sight. They would follow me around town, making chit chat, as I walked from my hotel to a restaurant.  One lady followed me for 8 miles while I was trekking.  These women would basically try to become friends with me, asking about where I am from, how old am I, do I have a family, children.  They would tell me about their family.  Then after 15 minutes or even an hour of following you, they will try to sell their crafts.  It's a very long sell indeed.  Tourist are actually discouraged to buy from street-sellers because it encourages children to drop out of school to try and sell in the streets.

Sapa minority women trying to make a sale

Women who followed me for 8 miles during a trek

It got to the point in Sapa (and I felt really awkward/guilty about this) that I would just pretend that I didn't speak English when these women approached me.  I would smile and wave/nod when they said hi, but not say anything else to them.  They would ask me where I was from, or if I wanted anything and I would just continue to smile and look at them kindly, but not say a word.  This seemed to be the most effective at getting them to leave me alone, but I felt very rude.

Personal Space

Vietnamese have different standards when it comes to personal space than we do in America.  Some of our guides explained that this is because in Vietnam often entire family live in one room, and so there is not much/any privacy.  You see this when traveling around.  Often "houses" are just one room with a couple beds, a table, a TV and a hotplate.  Because of the heat, people leave their doors and windows open, so when you walk by a house, you are basically seeing everything in there.

The way this effects me as a traveler is in several ways.  Closed doors don't mean much here.  We have had hotel staff walk into our room while we are naked in bed.  I have been trying on clothes in a dressing room and the sales person comes in unannounced and starts tugging off my clothes or adjusting my outfit without asking.  Women feel completely comfortable touching me.  I get arms put around me, taps on the butt, my hands held, all the time.  It's affectionate and sweet, but also a little surprising.

People often live in the same place they work.  Most restaurants, stores, hotels have a screen with a bed behind the counter.  If you use a bathroom in many places, you are actually using the personal bathroom of the store keeper and you know this because there are toothbrushes and laundry strewn about.  It feels strange to be going into their space like this... but I guess it cuts down on commute times.

This lack of personal space (or intimate nature) of the Vietnamese has an upside in that if I show any interest in a child or animal, the parent/owner will gladly hand it over to me to play with.  I've held many a baby, puppy, and cat.  At a restaurant I took the owner's baby to my table and played with him until my food arrived.  I've had little kids hand their puppies over to me to hold.  There seems to be a general lack of people being scared of strangers or protective of property here.  In the smaller towns, children wander in groups unsupervised.  People rarely close/lock their doors.  


Unsupervised children who shared their puppy with me.


Boy at the restaurant

Kids wandering around Cat Cat Village

Driving Rules
or lack there of...  Pretty much anything goes when it comes to driving in Vietnam.  People pass on both the left and the right.  People (in general) drive on the right side of the road, but not necessarily.  When you are on a motorbike, it's safe to assume that anything bigger than you is trying to kill you.  People make left hand turns, by moving left (into oncoming traffic) and then making a tight left (into oncoming traffic) and then merging right.  They basically become English for a few seconds.

Honking is constant.  You honk when you pass, you honk when someone is going too slow, you honk when you go through an intersection.  A red light at an intersection doesn't mean stop, it means slow down before you weave through traffic.  

Traffic Jam

People ride 4, 5, 6 to a single motorcycle.  People ride with infants. People ride with huge amounts of baggage on their motorbikes.  We saw one guy whose bike was so overloaded, he couldn't actually touch the peddles.  He was riding on his stomach over his load (like superman style) with his hands on the handle bars and his feet in the air.

Multi-riders

Heavy Load


No one stops for you when you try to cross the street, the concept of "right of way" or yielding seems to be lost on the Vietnamese.  Like I described in my first blog post, crossing the street is a major ordeal -- you basically say a prayer and walk hoping that people will weave around you.  Unfortunately we were told that if anything does go wrong here, the general rule is that it is the westerners fault.  So accidents involving westerners always result in the westerner paying off the police or other person.

It's pretty insane, although somehow seems to work.  I've heard that vehicular accidents/deaths (especially motorcycle) are high in Vietnam, but considering I would have expected to witness accidents constantly considering the chaos, this system seems to function surprisingly well.  However, I'm really glad I never had to drive in it myself.

White Skin

The Vietnamese are pretty obsessed with white skin.  Most moisturizers, creams, deodorants, sun-screens, and make-ups have bleach in them.  It's actually hard to find these products without whitening in them.  In most of the cities women are completely covered up during the day.  Even when it is 90 degrees and humid outside, women are wearing long pants, sweatshirts, gloves, shoes, hats, and face masks.  At first I thought this was a combination of modesty and protection from pollution and decease.  But then the tailor we met in Hoi An escorted us to another shop to get shoes, she wore a mask and told us it wasn't because of the smog but because of the sun.  At night it is clear that modesty is not required in this country because the women don tight mini-skirts and tiny tops to go out once the sun goes down.


Daytime Outfit
(image source)

Night Clothes
(image source)

The people in ads and on TV look really weird.  They are so bleached out that they look Caucasian, but then have  noses and eyes that look more Asian.  It's kinda creepy looking to me.



Whitening Cream Advertisement


The Internet

Vietnam's government blocks quite a few websites.  It isn't a pervasive as China, but among the sites that are blocked is Facebook.  There are some work-arounds which we have discovered, but they are inconsistent and do not give us full access to the sight.  Some would say that this is a good thing for me, but it's been hard to feel so isolated from people at home, and Facebook is such a good way for me to feel like I am keeping tabs on various people.  I miss my friends and family a lot.  There are many times when I wish so-and-so could be here to experience something with me.  

In general the internet is not great in Vietnam.  Downloading video / uploading pictures is very very slow.  Adam and I joke around that we feel like we are back in the 90's with the speeds here.  So I feel a little out of touch with people at home. Friends/family if you are reading this, I'm sorry for the slow response to emails and facebook interactions.  I miss you!  Hopefully Thailand will be better (although we are going straight to the Koh islands and so who knows what connection speeds will be like out there).

The Heat

I've traveled in hot and humid climates before, and so I don't know why here is affecting me so much more, but I've basically broken out in heat rashes on-and-off since we got here.  It's pretty normal for me to get heat rashes in a few places, I even get them in the US if I am exercising enough.  However in my third week here, my body just freaked out, and I now have a heat rash basically over my entire body.  I have heat rash on the palms of my hands and the soles of me feet, and I didn't even know that was possible.  Pretty much I look like a freak.  

Air conditioning is a real luxury here, and while most upscale hotels have it, as we've been trying to stay in more modest accommodating, some of the places we've stayed have only had fans.  Even at the places that have air conditioning, it is standard for a hotel to not provide electricity during the day, or restrict hot water and air conditioning to only be provided a certain times.  And even if you are staying at a very upscale place, the government will regularly shut of power to entire districts or towns and no one will have power for several hours during that time.


The beginning of my heat rash.  Over the next 
two days it spread to the rest of my body.

Bathrooms (Annalise probably doesn't want to read this)

Most of the places we have visited have "western style" toilets, which has been a blessing.  I'm not sure if I could handle #2 on a squat toilet.  But it isn't standard for bathrooms to have toilet paper.  There is usually a hose for you to wash off with (or a bucket with water), but then you are left dripping wet... and I am not sure how to deal with that situation.  Because the standard way to "wipe" in Vietnam is via this hose, bathrooms are usually incredibly wet.  So whenever you enter a bathroom the floor is covered in fluid (and sometimes the walls and toilet seat too).  Now presumably this is just water from the hose (with perhaps some diluted human waste), however I (with my western standards of bathroom cleanliness) feel very uneasy walking in my flip flops on these floors.

Also it is pretty standard for there not to be a separate bath/shower but for there to just be a shower head next to the sink.  This means that when you shower, you get the entire bathroom wet as well.  Often our hotel bathrooms are in a permanent state of damp and wet.  A nice breeding ground for lovely bacteria.  

It's amazing how quickly I have adjusted to this state of affairs.  In the first week I had a really hard time with the bathroom situation.  Now I don't even bat an eyelash when I find myself in a squat-toilet bathroom, which is dripping wet, and has no toilet paper.  


Squat toilet bathroom

Adam and I have come up with a saying whenever something is unexpected here (for the good or the bad). We simply stay "Viet-fucking-nam" and laugh at ourselves.

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